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  #1  
Old 23-10-2013, 06:29 PM
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Default More bad news

Well for some of us anyway.

I heard on the radio that as of 01/12/2013, a brand new tax will be imposed across the UK. Nobody is exempt from paying it, no matter your age, marital status, genre, sexual orientation, political bias, or religion. EVERYBODY has to pay up.

No excuses for non payment. Enforcement officers are empowered to use live ammunition and harsh language on any person or group of people attempting to avoid payment. They will have more power than the HM Customs and Excise. They can enter your home and cart you off with out a warrant. You are presumed guilty until you prove yourself innocent. No legal aid for low income earners.

The new CUSTARD TAX is being seen as a new initiative to re-coup much needed funds for the government, who have lost billions in revenue since the price of fags and beer went through the roof.

I fear there will be blood on the streets and much wailing, gnashing of teeth and scouse bikers jumping off the roof of multi storey car parks. Somebody best break the news to Grav, he gonna be a tad upset.

Snigger snigger snigger

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PPS: Fenrir is still a cunt.
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Old 23-10-2013, 06:59 PM
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Good thing too..I have tried custard, as a kid we always had custard at school dinners, disgusting stuff, lumps and bits of skin on the top and mixed in with it..I would love to see a custard tax, I would vote for any government that banned the stuff.

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Old 23-10-2013, 08:12 PM
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So what happens if your caught for not paying the tax, do they take you into custardy?
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Old 23-10-2013, 09:01 PM
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That doesn't suprise me a bit, they've already banned blancmange for being racist.
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Old 24-10-2013, 07:19 AM
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Does this apply to only to ready made packets of Custard or the home made stuff.

Will they now post warning pictures on the packets of faces smeared with custard .....

Will packets of custard be hidden behins non descript screens to try and stop kiddies being tempted to try their hand at a bit of custard.

Thin edge of the wedge.. what next the bastards will be after our square sliced sausages and black pudding.....
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Old 24-10-2013, 01:44 PM
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Originally Posted by kidhaf View Post
Does this apply to only to ready made packets of Custard or the home made stuff.

Will they now post warning pictures on the packets of faces smeared with custard .....

Will packets of custard be hidden behins non descript screens to try and stop kiddies being tempted to try their hand at a bit of custard.

Thin edge of the wedge.. what next the bastards will be after our square sliced sausages and black pudding.....
No telling how far the bastards will go, but I think taxing square cut sausage will be the straw that breaks the camels back. The various parts of Wee Willie Wallace will be turning in various graves across the land.

(Not had any square cut sausage for fecking years, heathen bastards down here don't know what they are missing.)

Chopper
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Old 24-10-2013, 02:02 PM
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No telling how far the bastards will go, but I think taxing square cut sausage will be the straw that breaks the camels back. The various parts of Wee Willie Wallace will be turning in various graves across the land.

(Not had any square cut sausage for fecking years, heathen bastards down here don't know what they are missing.)

Chopper
Don't have a Farmfoods store near you then?

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Old 24-10-2013, 08:30 PM
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There will not be any sodding CUSTARD TAX now or in the future, EVER! so ner.
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Old 24-10-2013, 08:31 PM
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Oh, and I had square sausage recently as there is a Farmfoods frozen foods emporium down the road. They have Custard too.
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Old 24-10-2013, 10:16 PM
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Oh, and I had square sausage recently as there is a Farmfoods frozen foods emporium down the road. They have Custard too.
Durty bastid square slice an custard ......you need locking up fer yer perversions...
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  #11  
Old 25-10-2013, 12:53 AM
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There will not be any sodding CUSTARD TAX now or in the future, EVER! so ner.
Oh hiya, thought you were dead!

Chopper
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Old 25-10-2013, 09:37 AM
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I like square cut sausage..........cos its easier to put in yer sarnies ,and wont fall out......
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Old 25-10-2013, 10:12 AM
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tastes like crap though.

John.
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Old 25-10-2013, 11:24 PM
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tastes like crap though.

John.
So does sheep dip, but you don't hear us complaining.

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  #15  
Old 26-10-2013, 07:30 AM
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if they tax custard what will become of rhubarb
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Old 26-10-2013, 06:05 PM
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if they tax custard what will become of rhubarb
it will become a victim of circumstance, a sign of the times. However, social workers will be on hand to offer specialist counselling. No win no fee Legal aid lawyers will be standing by to help you claim compensation for a range of trauma related issues. Your mum and dad will become alcoholic drug addicts and your sister will join a cult. (I said CULT).

You may also feel the need to take on an allotment and be happy to wait fifteen years for the council to grant you one. By then you will find that growing your own is far too expensive due to the new allotment tax. Ce la vie!

Chopper
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Old 26-10-2013, 07:16 PM
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Yeah..all that..but..

I think he was referring to the kids TV program 'rhubarb and custard' spelt roobarb.

John.
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Old 27-10-2013, 12:46 AM
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Yeah..all that..but..

I think he was referring to roobarb.

John.
Roobarb??? Must be a welsh thing.

Chopper
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  #19  
Old 27-10-2013, 09:15 AM
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If you really want something to moan about, check out what the corupt pollies and pigs are doing to Bikers in Queensland Australia. Bikers jail terms are + 15 yrs and if you are an office holder plus 25. No bail, 3 or more wearing colours 6 months jail. Club houses are offlimits, jail for being on premises. etc etc
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Old 27-10-2013, 02:42 PM
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If you really want something to moan about, check out what the corupt pollies and pigs are doing to Bikers in Queensland Australia. Bikers jail terms are + 15 yrs and if you are an office holder plus 25. No bail, 3 or more wearing colours 6 months jail. Club houses are offlimits, jail for being on premises. etc etc
These new laws contravene just about every article in the UN Declaration of Human Rights and will hopefully be laughed out of court soon. Even some of the Police out there are refusing to apply them as they know they are illegal and immoral. Campbell and Bleurghie (whatever his name is. Bleijie or something) know this and are threatening them with the sack if they don't comply. This may be their undoing.
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Old 27-10-2013, 03:19 PM
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It's hard to be judgemental about this, we are over 12,000 miles away and only get one side of it..The wearing of colours is not restricted to bikers but extends to street gangs who terrorise, rape and mug people who can't defend themselves, we have the same thing in Britain but as it is generally in areas where people from other countries live and the government wants people to think we all live in harmony, it is not widely reported..for instance there have recently been reports of slavery for forced labour and sex in England and Wales but it is not very widely known. If the government really want to crack down on crime they have to stop concentrating on motorists who get caught in speed traps or park in the wrong place and start chasing thieves, shoplifters, and muggers and when they catch them, instead of giving them a short sentence because they only mugged the little old lady because they had nothing to eat, should give them the maximum sentence..

If they restrict the wearing of club colours it will extend to anyone wearing a 'uniform', patriots, boy scouts, guides, police, postmen, RAC, AA, note the C in RAC stands for club.

It must be difficult for a POLI (person of limited inteligence) to make such a law that would only include bikers.

John.
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Old 27-10-2013, 06:56 PM
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It must be difficult for a POLI (person of limited inteligence) to make such a law that would only include bikers.

John.
So what about Persons Of Limited Intelligence, Certified Experts ?
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Old 27-10-2013, 07:35 PM
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So what about Persons Of Limited Intelligence, Certified Experts ?
The actual words signified by "CE" have been disputed. It is often taken to be an abbreviation of Conformité Européenne, meaning "European Conformity".[3] However, "CE" originally stood for "Communauté Européenne", French for "European Community". In former German legislation, the CE marking was called "EG-Zeichen" meaning "European Community mark". The CE marking is a symbol of free marketability in the European Economic Area (Internal Market).

As nobody knows what it actually means I didn't bother adding the CE mark. but I'm sure that the people who made those laws qualify.

John.
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Old 28-10-2013, 01:04 AM
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Think you missed the mark there, Beer Monster.....
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Old 28-10-2013, 01:34 AM
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The actual words signified by "CE" have been disputed. It is often taken to be an abbreviation of Conformité Européenne, meaning "European Conformity".[3] However, "CE" originally stood for "Communauté Européenne", French for "European Community". In former German legislation, the CE marking was called "EG-Zeichen" meaning "European Community mark". The CE marking is a symbol of free marketability in the European Economic Area (Internal Market).

As nobody knows what it actually means I didn't bother adding the CE mark. but I'm sure that the people who made those laws qualify.

John.
John

The CE mark actually means Cunts of Europe. I'd have told ya if you asked.

Chopper
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  #26  
Old 28-10-2013, 05:29 PM
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arent all europeans, cunts
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Old 28-10-2013, 08:49 PM
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Think you missed the mark there, Beer Monster.....
Mark...

Hahahaha.

I still stand by my earlier statement.
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