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Old 07-12-2011, 11:43 PM
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John Hopkins John Hopkins is offline
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Default Sex on mars

The year is 2222 and Maureen and John land on Mars
after accumulating enough Frequent Flier miles.

They meet a Martian couple and are talking about all
sorts of things. John asks if Mars has a stock market, if they have
laptop computers, how they make money, etc.

Finally, Maureen brings up the subject of sex. 'Just how do you guys do it?' she asks.
The Martian responds, 'Pretty much the way you do.'

A discussion ensues and finally the couples decide to swap partners for the night and experience one another..

Maureen and the male Martian go off to a bedroom where the Martian strips.
He's got only a teeny, weenie member about half an inch long and just a quarter-inch thick. 'I don't think this is going to work,' says Maureen.

'Why?' he asks. 'What's the matter?' 'Well,' she replies, 'it's just not long enough to reach me!'

'No problem,' he says, and proceeds to slap his forehead with his palm. With each slap of his forehead, his member grows until it's quite impressively long. 'Well,' she says, 'that's quite impressive, but it is still narrow.' 'No problem,' he says, and starts pulling his ears. With each pull, his member grows wider and wider until the entire measurement is extremely exciting to her. 'Wow!' she exclaims, as they fell into bed and made mad passionate love.

The next day the couples rejoin their other partners and go their separate ways.
As they walked along, John asks Maureen, 'Well, was it any good?' 'I hate to say it,' says Maureen, 'but it was wonderful. How about you?'

'It was horrible,' he replies. 'All I got was a headache. She kept slapping my forehead and pulling my ears.'
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Old 08-12-2011, 01:17 AM
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BlackPig BlackPig is offline
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Fer the love o' the sky Mr. Hopkins that one is older than yerself
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Old 08-12-2011, 05:00 AM
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Friar Tuck Friar Tuck is offline
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I always said my wife didn't belong on this planet! Now I know why!
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Old 08-12-2011, 01:38 PM
pale rider pale rider is offline
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my great grandad told me that one
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Old 08-12-2011, 02:41 PM
Nufkamp Nufkamp is offline
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I'm sure that one was found with the Dead Sea Scrolls
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Old 08-12-2011, 07:53 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackPig View Post
Fer the love o' the sky Mr. Hopkins that one is older than yerself
Panto season..

Oh no it isn't...

John.
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