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  #1  
Old 20-12-2010, 05:10 PM
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Default Worst Ever Christmas Songs

I don't think I can stand another 4 days of this. This shite is on a constant loop all day at work and there is nothing I can do about it. Never mind fuckin Water-boarding, the constant playing of Christmas songs should be outlawed by the Geneva Convention.

In Third Place.
Merry Christmas Everyone by Shakin Stevens.
I am sure that when the Intergalatic Police call time on our violent, miserable planet, they will be playing this song on the loud speakers of their Death Stars just to remind us of why we are being summarily vaporised.

In Second Place.
Mary's Boy Child by Bony M.
I thought that we had heard the last warblings of these Harvesters of Souls when we said cheerio to the seventies. No. Three decades later and our senses are still assaulted by that little wriggling pixie and his soul-less crew. Bugger me! I don't think they even sang it themselves.

In First Place.
Fairytale of New York by The Pogues and Kirsty MacColl.
A thoroughly unworthy ditty spewed out of the gobs of a manky Irish git and a woman who never got to grips with the basics of motorboat safety. For the Christs sake. You cannot rhyme arse with last, unless you are Dick Van Fuckin Dyke in Mayery Porpins of course.
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Old 20-12-2010, 05:38 PM
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This is difficult..try to find three bad songs.

Well almost everything by Cliff Richards but these are clear gems.

Psalm 150.

The Lords Prayer.

Sorry I didn't really mean almost.

and.

Don't they know it's Christmas.

John
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Old 20-12-2010, 05:43 PM
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Kirsty McColl was hit by a wanker speeding through a swimming/diving only area...after pushing her son to safty as the boat sped towards them !
My heart bleeds for you !
I want to nominate The Darkness with their Bell End ....christmas tradgedy of a song !

Last edited by Beano; 20-12-2010 at 05:45 PM.
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Old 20-12-2010, 07:34 PM
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Cliff - Mistletoe and Wine. I'd take belladonna and hemlock rather than suffer this crap again.

Wham - Last Christmas. I wish George Michael had hit that shop wall a bit fucking harder.

Paul McCartney - Wonderful Christmas Time. Give Mark Chapman parole and another autograph book.
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Old 20-12-2010, 07:51 PM
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Tesco round here keeps playing Gary Glitter's Rock and Roll Christmas on a loop.

I'm tempted to whip up a media outrage about a supermarket thats paying money to a convicted paedophile.

Glitter and Tesco in one hit? result!
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Old 20-12-2010, 09:36 PM
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Bird, you are a truly evil man... Go on, I dare you.
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Old 20-12-2010, 09:40 PM
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQrdx...layer_embedded

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Old 20-12-2010, 10:35 PM
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All songs with the word christmas in the title !!!

Or snow

Or white

Or bells

Or happy

Or mistletoe

Or wine

Or basically any words at all
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Old 21-12-2010, 06:45 AM
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Safe to say Strider's favourite Yuletide song is the Cage Against The Machine thing then
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Old 21-12-2010, 09:04 AM
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I think you mean Rage against the machine?
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Old 21-12-2010, 01:30 PM
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arrgh, now I'm back to Horse Outside by the Rubber bandits.
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Old 21-12-2010, 01:37 PM
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Fuck your Honda civic, I've a horse outside....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljPFZrRD3J8
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Old 21-12-2010, 05:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fungus View Post
I think you mean Rage against the machine?
No, I meant the 4-odd minutes of silence by John Cage.
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Old 21-12-2010, 05:21 PM
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Yer gotta like Slade and Wizard though aincha.
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Old 21-12-2010, 07:35 PM
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I do, but their xmas songs stopped being good and became truly monotonous years ago. The only good thing about them is they kept Noddy Holder and Roy Wood's bank managers happy.....
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Old 21-12-2010, 07:49 PM
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Mudd ?
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Old 21-12-2010, 08:29 PM
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How could one possibly forget the amazing performance on TOTP by Mud and a ventriloquists dummy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5VrvdOizUc
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Old 21-12-2010, 09:05 PM
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One that springs to mind is Chris De fucking Burgh's 'A Spaceman came travelling'
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Old 21-12-2010, 09:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nufkamp View Post
No, I meant the 4-odd minutes of silence by John Cage.
I stand corrected.
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  #20  
Old 23-12-2010, 12:35 PM
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Corey Taylor from Slipknott has a good one kicking about Youtube at the mo.
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