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  #1  
Old 27-08-2008, 09:10 AM
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Exclamation A moment of your time please?

I'll be starting on the last page of the new issue of Trike later today or first thing tomorrow and what I could do with is some trike-related tales - funny 'uns, sad 'uns, silly 'uns, scary 'uns, cool 'uns, owt!

They can be as long or as short as you like - going to compile them, y'see.

What y' got?

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  #2  
Old 27-08-2008, 09:59 AM
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do ya want 'em sending via PM or do we all get to "preview" em Nik?
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Old 27-08-2008, 10:01 AM
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do ya want 'em sending via PM or do we all get to "preview" em Nik?
Whatever you like, mate.
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Old 27-08-2008, 11:25 AM
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Bought a mini engined trike about 6 years ago, cos I had injured my back and couldn't ride at the time... the clutch pedal sometimes stuck, but was not a problem until...... waiting to turn right into a sideroad in heavy traffic, saw a gap as a kind driver had slowed down a bit for me to cross, clutch down into first, lifted foot...clutch pedal stayed down! lowered revs and eased clutch up by putting foot underneath it, it came to just about the biting point and stuck, never mind, reved like crazy and was starting to turn, clutch sprang up, wheelied up across the other side of the road, onto pavement, between railings and pedestrian lights and into pub car park, managed to stop just before hitting the wall!!!! Witnessed by nice Mr Bike Plod , who came into the car park and was pissing himself, especially when he saw me shaking with fear.

He gave the trike a good looking over, and advised me to get it sorted ASAP, and followed me round the corner to my house.

Best trike I ever had, should not have swapped it for a bike
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Old 27-08-2008, 11:29 AM
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Bought a mini engined trike about 6 years ago, cos I had injured my back and couldn't ride at the time... the clutch pedal sometimes stuck, but was not a problem until...... waiting to turn right into a sideroad in heavy traffic, saw a gap as a kind driver had slowed down a bit for me to cross, clutch down into first, lifted foot...clutch pedal stayed down! lowered revs and eased clutch up by putting foot underneath it, it came to just about the biting point and stuck, never mind, reved like crazy and was starting to turn, clutch sprang up, wheelied up across the other side of the road, onto pavement, between railings and pedestrian lights and into pub car park, managed to stop just before hitting the wall!!!! Witnessed by nice Mr Bike Plod , who came into the car park and was pissing himself, especially when he saw me shaking with fear.

He gave the trike a good looking over, and advised me to get it sorted ASAP, and followed me round the corner to my house.

Best trike I ever had, should not have swapped it for a bike
Ta! Nice one.
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Old 27-08-2008, 11:42 AM
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Conversation I overheard..

Trike owner, "So why did my drive shaft fall off?"

Guy fixing it, "It didn't. It just came unhooked when your axle started falling off."


Me, probably slightly ashen, on returning from a "test ride" on a mate's newly acquired trike "Well Andy, it's not so much it doesn't steer very well, as it doesn't fucking steer at all!"


Guy with trike "So why does the frame keep cracking?"

Me "Probably because exhaust pipe isn't really the ideal material to make a frame out of...."


Another guy with a car engined trike "You got any idea why it keeps jumping out of gear?"

Me "I expect it's because your rubber mounted engine moves around whereas your solid mounted gear lever doesn't?"


Me on being asked about an aspect of construction, "I'm telling you it won't pass an MOT."

Annoying bloke, "But it's what they do in the Aircraft indutry!"

Me, "Then get a fucking Certificate of Airworthiness on it!"


Me to a sceptic, after deliberately hitting a wall with a rear wheel at about 20MPH "So, you still reckon it's going to bend under hard acceleration?"


Customer "Can you make the suspension adjustable?"

Me "Nope."

Customer "Why not?"

Me "Because you'll fuck it up."
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Old 27-08-2008, 12:16 PM
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Old 27-08-2008, 01:08 PM
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Got a half finished CX500 trike as due to the wife having balance problems she couldn’t ride pillion any more.
Got it sorted. MOT done and taxed etc.
Come the big day of the first run with her on we eased out of the drive way with all the local kids watching and waving.
Took it easy down the main road, left on to another main road and then down the slip road to the dual carriage way.
Thought I would give it a bit more throttle, wife seemed fine, sitting behind me no prob.
Opened it up some more and got to about 60,which was just about top speed.
Felt the wife wiggling about behind me but couldn’t hear her shouting or anything.
Thought she was waving to the car drivers that were waving to us.
Pose mode.
Got to home after about 10 mins, got off and wondered why the wife had her arms wrapped around her self.
She soon told me.
Turns out as we got to about 55MPH my wife’s sleeved pop studded top had burst open.
Hence the waves from the car drivers were not at me but at my wife trying to gather her top around her as it was blowing in the slipstream while covering her tits.
Hence all the wriggling.
As you may guess, it was all my fault.
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Old 27-08-2008, 01:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lowrider View Post
Got a half finished CX500 trike as due to the wife having balance problems she couldn’t ride pillion any more.
Got it sorted. MOT done and taxed etc.
Come the big day of the first run with her on we eased out of the drive way with all the local kids watching and waving.
Took it easy down the main road, left on to another main road and then down the slip road to the dual carriage way.
Thought I would give it a bit more throttle, wife seemed fine, sitting behind me no prob.
Opened it up some more and got to about 60,which was just about top speed.
Felt the wife wiggling about behind me but couldn’t hear her shouting or anything.
Thought she was waving to the car drivers that were waving to us.
Pose mode.
Got to home after about 10 mins, got off and wondered why the wife had her arms wrapped around her self.
She soon told me.
Turns out as we got to about 55MPH my wife’s sleeved pop studded top had burst open.
Hence the waves from the car drivers were not at me but at my wife trying to gather her top around her as it was blowing in the slipstream while covering her tits.
Hence all the wriggling.
As you may guess, it was all my fault.
..............
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Old 27-08-2008, 01:53 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lowrider View Post
Got a half finished CX500 trike as due to the wife having balance problems she couldn’t ride pillion any more.
Got it sorted. MOT done and taxed etc.
Come the big day of the first run with her on we eased out of the drive way with all the local kids watching and waving.
Took it easy down the main road, left on to another main road and then down the slip road to the dual carriage way.
Thought I would give it a bit more throttle, wife seemed fine, sitting behind me no prob.
Opened it up some more and got to about 60,which was just about top speed.
Felt the wife wiggling about behind me but couldn’t hear her shouting or anything.
Thought she was waving to the car drivers that were waving to us.
Pose mode.
Got to home after about 10 mins, got off and wondered why the wife had her arms wrapped around her self.
She soon told me.
Turns out as we got to about 55MPH my wife’s sleeved pop studded top had burst open.
Hence the waves from the car drivers were not at me but at my wife trying to gather her top around her as it was blowing in the slipstream while covering her tits.
Hence all the wriggling.
As you may guess, it was all my fault.

PMSL
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  #11  
Old 27-08-2008, 07:23 PM
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While setting the timing on reliant trike a few yrs ago, strobe light connected, distributor nut loosened, me sat on ground with legs underneath engine, started trike only to find was in gear! ran over my legs, I then grabbed the rear rack to try and stop the trike, just to be dragged 25ft across the yard. trike finally stopped when front wheel had gone through next doors fence.

Then there was wifes 1st go on the V6, find a nice quiet road, riding along for a mile or two, saw Police in the road directing us away from an accident up ahead.

The P.C.'s face was a picture as he flung himself into the ditch at the side of the road, as the wife shouted 'Move - I can't bloody turn it' I nearly fell off the back I was laughing that much.

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Old 28-08-2008, 11:05 AM
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Originally Posted by v8_trike View Post
While setting the timing on reliant trike a few yrs ago, strobe light connected, distributor nut loosened, me sat on ground with legs underneath engine, started trike only to find was in gear! ran over my legs, I then grabbed the rear rack to try and stop the trike, just to be dragged 25ft across the yard. trike finally stopped when front wheel had gone through next doors fence.

Then there was wifes 1st go on the V6, find a nice quiet road, riding along for a mile or two, saw Police in the road directing us away from an accident up ahead.

The P.C.'s face was a picture as he flung himself into the ditch at the side of the road, as the wife shouted 'Move - I can't bloody turn it' I nearly fell off the back I was laughing that much.

I thought I was the only one shit happened to
ps I pm'd mine to Nik to save embarrasment
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  #13  
Old 28-08-2008, 02:47 PM
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sod the embarrasment, go public!!!
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Old 28-08-2008, 03:04 PM
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Quote:
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I thought I was the only one shit happened to
ps I pm'd mine to Nik to save embarrasment
Ditto....sod the embarrasment , we wouldn't laugh at all
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Old 28-08-2008, 07:50 PM
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yeh, like chuff. all I'll say is plenty of folk saw it, doh!
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Old 28-08-2008, 09:16 PM
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go on you know you want to....lol
would be raofpml...but you aint told us yet.....lol
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Old 28-08-2008, 09:20 PM
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Nah, cant. to shy n' retiring.
No damage to trike tho', well sturdy whe............. oh bugger.
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Old 29-08-2008, 09:49 AM
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I had forgot about this one.
Mate of mine built a V12 trike with an automatic gear box.
Huge beast it was and built like a tank.
It went well but had a problem with the “ brain” in that the engine was running on choke almost all the time.
As to be suspected most Jaguar shops wouldn’t look at it.
But he found an ex Jag mechanic that said he could sort it, he did.
But as a final check he had the trike idling while he made some last adjustments, but he had not sussed that the cut out to stop the engine being started when in gear was not fitted.
The trike was in gear.
You can guess what happened.
He blipped the throttle while he was standing next to the trike and it took off going like a train.
It took down two wooden fences with no problem, demolished a low brick wall and only stopped when it got to a larger and sturdier wall.
When the mechanic got to it he swore it was sniggering.
Damage to the trike was a slight bend in the forks.
The bill for the damage it caused was quite high.
To say the least.
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Old 29-08-2008, 12:14 PM
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I had forgot about this one.
Mate of mine built a V12 trike with an automatic gear box.
Huge beast it was and built like a tank.
It went well but had a problem with the “ brain” in that the engine was running on choke almost all the time.

Your mate based up in Blyth area by any chance? was chatting to a guy a few yrs ago with a gert big V12 that had the same prob !!
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Old 29-08-2008, 12:32 PM
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I took a picture once of a merlin(?) engined trike for 100% a couple of years ago, It went passed me and I stood behind it to take a picture, just as the after burner kicked in.....Dunno how Pats camera didn't melt!!
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Old 29-08-2008, 12:35 PM
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I took a picture once of a merlin(?) engined trike for 100% a couple of years ago, It went passed me and I stood behind it to take a picture, just as the after burner kicked in.....Dunno how Pats camera didn't melt!!
Could have been Paul Baileys Jet trike..

scary machine
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Old 29-08-2008, 05:08 PM
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Your mate based up in Blyth area by any chance? was chatting to a guy a few yrs ago with a gert big V12 that had the same prob !!
Yeah could have been one of two mates.
The builder lived in Seaton Delaval and the guy the bought it after the "smash" lived in Blyth but owns Morpeth Motorcycles.
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Old 29-08-2008, 06:18 PM
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cool, bit of a beast that trike, is it still in the area? and does it still have that unfeasibly small petrol tank fitted
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Old 29-08-2008, 09:57 PM
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cool, bit of a beast that trike, is it still in the area? and does it still have that unfeasibly small petrol tank fitted
Last i heard it was stripped for repairs and is still in that state.
Trouble is John the guy who has it also build trikes for a living and works on bikes so as always its the punters bikes that get the attention.
As to the tank,no idea how it will end up.
The name of the trike was Nemisis,built by Ziggy
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Old 30-08-2008, 01:40 AM
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My friend and I were going down to Faro on my classic Phoenix trike and I decided to go M1, M42 and then M5 to Plymouth. Got onto the M42 and found a huge traffic jam which we sat in for several hours. When we finally got going and onto the M5 the junction box packed up entirely and the battery boiled and most of the electrics collapsed. Fortunately I had taken insurance with Brittany Ferries and they got us back home, eventually as the breakdown services were swamped and stuck in the jam behind us. We went in the my car as the insurance only supplied cars and mine has air conditioning.
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Old 28-09-2008, 07:24 AM
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Wink trike trouble

hi, I thought you might like to here the tale of my trike troubles, I live down in New Zealand where trikes are fairly popular but are a pain to get through the red tape. As usual the government feels in necessary to make any sort of vehicle modifications subject to 'certification', Now while I am all for a safe vehicle some of the rules are as stupid as the guys who invent them. Still at least we aren't as bad as the Germans and their TUV!!
Any way it was my first trike build here in NZ and I took my Kawasaki Z1300 powered machine down to the Cert guy who managed to find a couple of little things that needed fixing but nothing major, he then had to take the trike out on the road for real world braking tests, now I am running a reliant diff with Holden drum brakes as the wheels I wanted to run used that stud pattern. All good so far, the test included 6 hard braking stops while being timed by stop watch to see if it pulled up in the correct distance and in a controlled manner. Any way he disappeared off down to his country road test area and after half an hour I as getting worried, sure enough he turns up after hitching a lift back to the test centre. Apparently my diff has exploded and there is oil every where, he had done 5 of the brake tests and on the sixth bang, bugger!
So we drive down to the trike to find oil and alloy across the road and the diff twisted downwards causing the drive shaft to force the diff apart. The reason for this became apparent when I eventually trailered the trike home and remove the axle. The frame is clamped to the axle by two large clamps much like a big handle bar clamps, and then locked with a large grub screw which locates on a drilled dimple in the axle. This has worked before on earlier trikes I have built over the years but a combination of over powerful brakes and an overpriced powercoat job which had many layers of powder including a top clear coat, caused the clamps to force the powder coat off and allow the axle to swivel under the hard breaking. This left me a nice unpowedercoated area on my axle and a worse for wear diff.
Now Reliants are even rarer than the proverbial Rocking horse stuff down here so I had to wait until a good mate came over from the UK on holiday and bring me a diff housing in his luggage and of course a bill for lotsa beer. It was worth it and the trike managed to finally pass muster and that axle wasn't going to move again after I welded the lot in place!
I then enjoyed a summer of triking until I found out that the early Z1300's had small sumps which caused bottom end problems, yee haa I threw a rod another 6 months off the road until I could get enough bits to rebuild the motor, complete with a later model deep sump. This was to be the start of a few years of triking until this year when I decided to fit suspension to the rear end, so at the moment its sitting on blocks waiting the weather here to be warm enough that I can finish repainting the tin wear.

cheers kiwitriker.
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Old 10-11-2008, 05:28 PM
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Great stories, guys, any more?
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Old 10-11-2008, 08:46 PM
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A mate built an XJ900 trike, finished it, went to test drive it, fired it up in his garage, put it into first........................and went out the rear of the garage via the concrete wall!!!!!!!!!!
My mate had only put the axle in upside down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Or there is the time i borrowed a car transporter from a good friend who hired out trailers, she wasnt there but her mum said it was next door and just couple it up and will see me later.
Drove from Derby to Somerset, picked up a reliant trike, drove back to Derby and went to drop off the trailer (total of over 350 miles), to find my friend waiting, angry and astonished to find i had driven all that way with a trailer with knackered wheel bearings!

Or the time i was nearly done for curb crawling on my Fiat 126 trike, my son (2 years old) sat on the back seat, hyperventilating, so i had slowed down, as i past a crowed of young girls, who couldnt see my son, as a cop car passed the other way, saw me looking over my shoulder and doing less than 5mph, thought "ahh well ave im".
Oh how my ex wife laughed!

Or the time my son (18 month's old at the time) told my ex wife that "daddy is building a beach bastard" (in my defence i had said "beach B'stard).
Oh what an arguement ensued.

Or the time i pulled a mate across a rally site, sat in a tractor tyre, tied to the back of my wifes GS 850 trike, unfortunatlie the rally was normaly inhabited by cattle and they had been leaving a lot of "messages".
Friend sat in the tyre had closed his eyes as there was wet stuff flying up at him and had not realised what was landing all over him!
Oh how we laughed, not for long though as he was bigger than us.

There are many more but i think this is enough.
odie
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Old 11-11-2008, 09:04 AM
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.....................
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  #30  
Old 12-11-2008, 11:35 AM
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CW rally at Melchbourne. Bog cleaning truck failed to arrive so prospects were gathered to pull bogs over to a drain for emptying/cleaning. Rat from london had a trike and it was his job to tow the units off the field to the drain. Two prospects were given the job of throwing a rope round each unit ready for towing. At one, they failed to realise that a guy had just entered and was busy joining the dots on his bare knees when he was suddenly whisked off down the field. His cries of woe went unheeded, indeed, the gathering throng of piss taking rally goers drowned him out. Anyway, 15/20 miles an hour on skids across an eneven field was doing him no good at all but then the inevitable happened. The skids hit a rut cross wise and tipped the lot up and over.
I'll leave you to imagine what a sight he looked clambering out of the bog covered in blue piss water, shit, bogroll and what looked like 5 years worth of compacted noodles.









He wasnt happy.
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