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  #31  
Old 18-12-2005, 02:06 PM
Doro Doro is offline
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I want one - be good for ikkle me if some 15 stone tattooed perp tried to attack me

or maybe I should stick to stuffing my door key in his eye and spraying my perfume in his face to make it smart

lol

only I don't carry perfume around wif me
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  #32  
Old 18-12-2005, 02:07 PM
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acshurly it's got to be something to do with capacitors - yeah - gonna make me one
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  #33  
Old 18-12-2005, 02:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doro
acshurly it's got to be something to do with capacitors - yeah - gonna make me one
Oh fck! gypsy had better behave from now on then (not that he has misbehaved to my knowledge hang on that means someone else might know oh bugger I'm just digging an digging I'll go now byeee!)
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  #34  
Old 18-12-2005, 02:50 PM
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Read somewhere a couple of months ago that a guy got 4/5 years for using one of them

Apart from that could you do a re-run only this time when we're all watching
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  #35  
Old 18-12-2005, 02:54 PM
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Here ya go Doro !!

http://www.personalarms.com/schematics.htm
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  #36  
Old 18-12-2005, 03:35 PM
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I seem to remember making something like that in school for a project... before all this namby-pampy wishy-washy Health and Safety in the Classroom tot came in
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  #37  
Old 18-12-2005, 04:03 PM
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this would be no good wen u were drunk and your real mobile rang

http://www.personalarms.com/stun_gun/stun_gun_phone.htm
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  #38  
Old 18-12-2005, 09:41 PM
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If they are that dangerous that they are classed as firearms, how come they are 'safe' for the plod to use without being specially trained. Fecking law is bollox..... The cops won't help you and if you help yourself, you get knicked.
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  #39  
Old 18-12-2005, 09:50 PM
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the plad do have ta be trained to use them, i dont know how much, but they do.......
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  #40  
Old 18-12-2005, 10:04 PM
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Press the RED button, and point at perp, not at fellow officers.... Do not use to heat coffee or hotdogs..... Make sure safety catch is on if putting in your trouser pocket....
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  #41  
Old 18-12-2005, 10:07 PM
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Also, give a warning, spray at chin, and work up the face, and most important of all, have the wind at YOUR BACK !!
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  #42  
Old 18-12-2005, 10:12 PM
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For a STUN GUN?
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  #43  
Old 18-12-2005, 10:20 PM
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no, that refers to the pepper spray, which is also classed for a firearm.

I, for one, are glad the police have stun guns/tazers , as opposed to all police carryin pistols. That would be a bad idea !!
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  #44  
Old 03-02-2006, 10:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by excalibur
My girlfriend is fond of saying that my last words on this earth will be something akin to “Well, I have outdone myself once again.”
No doubt you will see this true story chronicled in a Lifetime movie in the near future.
Here goes...
Last weekend I spied something at the pawn shop that tickled my fancy. (Note: Keep in mind that my “fancy” is easily tickled). I bought something really cool for my wife.
The occasion was our 1st anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my sweet girl.
What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized Taser gun with a clip. For those of you who are not familiar with this product, it is a less-than-lethal stun gun with two metal prongs designed to incapacitate an assailant with a shock of high-voltage, low amperage electricity while you flee to safety. The effects are supposed to be short lived with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, but allowing you adequate time to retreat to safety.
You simply jab the prongs into your 15 stone tattooed assailant, push the button, and it will render him a slobbering, goggle-eyed, muscle-twitching, whimpering, pencil-neck geek. If you’ve never seen one of these things in action, then you’re truly missing out—way too cool!
Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was so disappointed. Upon reading the directions (we don’t need no stinkin’ directions), I found much to my chagrin that this particular model would not create an arch between the prongs. How disappointing!
I do love fire for effect. I learned that if I pushed the button, however, and pressed it against a metal surface that I’d get the blue arch of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs that I was so looking forward to. I did so.
Awesome! Sparks, a blue arch of electricity, and a loud pop! Yipeeeeee!
I’m easily amused, just for your information, but I have yet to explain to her what that burn spot on the face of her microwave is.
Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn’t be all that bad with only two AAA batteries, etc., etc.
There I sat in my recliner, my dog looking on intently (trusting little soul), reading the directions (that would be me, not the dog) and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh and blood target.
I must admit I thought about zapping the dog for a fraction of a second and thought better of it. He is such a sweet pup, after all.
But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong? Was I wrong to think that? It seemed reasonable to me at the time??
So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, Taser in the other. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water.
All the while I’m looking at this little device (measuring about 5” long, less than ¾ inch in circumference, pretty cute really, and loaded with two itsy, bitsy AAA batteries) thinking to myself, “No friggin’ way! “Friggin’ way - trust me, but I’m getting ahead of myself.
What happened next is almost beyond description, but I’ll do my best.
Those of you who know me well have got a pretty good idea of what followed. I’m sitting there alone, the dog looking on with his head cocked to one side as to say, “Don’t do it buddy,” reasoning that a one-second burst from such a tiny lil’ ole thing couldn’t hurt all that bad (sound, rational thinking under the circumstances, wouldn’t you agree?).
I decided to give myself a one-second burst just for the hell of it.
(Note: You know, a bad decision is like hindsight—always 20-20. It is so obvious that it was a bad decision after the fact, even though it seemed so right at the time. Don’t ya just hate that?)
I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and HOLY*********! DAaaaauuuuuuMN!!!
I’m pretty sure that Arnie Schartzenegger ran in through the front door, picked me up out of that recliner, then body slammed me on the carpet over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, soaking wet, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position. The dog was standing over me making sounds I had never heard before, licking my face, undoubtedly thinking to himself, “Do it again, do it again!”
(NOTE: If you ever feel compelled to mug yourself with a Taser, one note of caution. There is no such thing as a one-second burst when you zap yourself. You’re not going to let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor . . . Then, if you’re lucky, you won’t dislodge one of the prongs ¼” deep into your thigh like yours truly.)
FUCK ME ; that hurt! A minute or so later (I can’t be sure, as time was a relative thing at this point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My glasses were on the TV across the room. How did they get there??? My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 10 stone, give or take an ounce or two, I’m pretty sure.
By the way, has anyone seen my testicles? I think they ran away. I’m offering a reward. They’re round, ! kinda hairy, and handsome if I must say so myself. Miss ‘em; sure would like to get ‘em back.
its back....................
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  #45  
Old 03-02-2006, 10:22 PM
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and pissed meself again!!!!!
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  #46  
Old 03-02-2006, 11:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by happybiker
All this has been discussed before on the forum. Have a look at Critch's Fun with electronics thread from 04-08-2005 or search the forum for stun gun. as much info as u will need
The only hard bit is finding the mini amp
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  #47  
Old 04-02-2006, 12:17 AM
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That is gonna keep me sniggering for weeks........................

I will never ever be able to tell this story...........
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  #48  
Old 04-02-2006, 12:18 AM
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this may win all
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  #49  
Old 04-02-2006, 12:34 AM
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absolutely fantastic, I could have wrote my bike off today, come home to my house burned down and this would still have made me P1ss my self laughing, you are a star,
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