I'll just mention in passing...

[tetlee]

If you are on a running machine in the gym and a lady in a brief leotard gets on the machine next to yours, do not be tempted to glance sideways at the jiggly bits...
It's possible to tread on the non moving section and end up getting spat off and collecting a friction burned knee off the spinning rubber track on the way.
Just sayin'...

[Strider]

Two questions ...........

1. What is a gym?
2. What is this "running" machine you speak of?

[tetlee]

A gym is where instead of doing any exercise, spotty youngsters sit around poking their fancy telephones to see if anyone likes them on farcebook, and old geezers like me go just to work at keeping our joints from seizing up.

A Running Machine a device where poxy dogs can't chase me like they do if I run on the street.

[Friar Tuck]

What you really mean is it's a place where old gits like you go to watch jiggly bits whilst falling off trundle machines hoping said owner of jiggly bits takes pity and helps you to your feet?

[Biker Buster]

A gym, is that the place with all of the chocolate vending machines in the lobby?

[tetlee]

" a place where old gits like you go to watch jiggly bits whilst falling off trundle machines "

Ha! No such luck in this gym, it's a grotty unfashionable place and only used by a few Burger monster ladies, and decrepit 'ol gits like me trying to stay alive. She must of wandered in by mistake..

No chocolate machines Buster, just 'Energy Bars'... Machine's been there a while though, it's the home of many spiders and the stuff inside is price tagged at 1/6d each.

[strima]

You spelt bar wrong.

[miniondave]

Amateur.
If you can't use a running machine without falling off while watching jiggly bits then you should give up the machine and go to a step aerobics class instead.

[tetlee]

That is probably good advice, although to be fair it is a rare event for any ladies worth ogglin' to appear in my gym. I fear many appear to have fallen out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down..Just to give an idea of the place, they sweep the changing rooms out once a year and clean up all the fag ends and Big Mac wrappers. Still at least one of the six showers works...sometimes. But it is cheap... The clientele are definitely not dedicated gym rats by a long shot, most are office workers who come in during their lunch breaks. They perch on the apparatus and make 'phone calls or sit poking their 'phones to see who loves them. Then they can't work out why they are still waddling even though they 'go to the gym' twice a week.

[Friar Tuck]

Definately sounds more like a perverted sex club to me......

[tetlee]

Ha! Strange you should say that Friar T, I used to go to a posh gym in town but some members spent more time hanging around in the showers than they did in the gym. I noticed one bloke always followed everyone into the showers, so I told him I'd fill him in if he followed me. He complained and they feckin' banned me!!
So it's the cheap gym and falling off the runners for me...

[Sir Ewok]

I'm going to start a gym in the new year, you will pay a years subscription and after a month it will be converted into a bar, then you can tell everybody you go to the gym every night........

[tetlee]

Sounds like a brilliant business idea to me. If you do bacon sarnies and refrain from playing that rap crap music, sign me up for membership.

[Friar Tuck]

Originally Posted by Sir Ewok

I'm going to start a gym in the new year, you will pay a years subscription and after a month it will be converted into a bar, then you can tell everybody you go to the gym every night........

Wot he means he'll charge you an entry fee to the public bogs...

[Friar Tuck]

Originally Posted by tetlee

Sounds like a brilliant business idea to me. If you do bacon sarnies and refrain from playing that rap crap music, sign me up for membership.

Funny you should say that. His taste in music is err...go listen to earworm thread. And if he offers you bacon sarnies...beat a hasty retreat! That's all I'm sayin'.....

[Sir Ewok]

Originally Posted by Friar Tuck

Funny you should say that. His taste in music is err...go listen to earworm thread. And if he offers you bacon sarnies...beat a hasty retreat! That's all I'm sayin'.....

Most of the music on my playlist is stuff I like but some was put on to entertain passengers, very little rap though, lots of oldies, weirdies and rock....

Most of the rap tht I do have is older stuff not the bling bling crap you have now.....