Thread: joke of the day
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Old 15-01-2015, 04:22 PM
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Noisy Scouse Gobshite and Owner of the snigger TM
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: in a house and a tent at weekends
Posts: 19,073

Jaguar joke.

Porcupine is running thru the jungle. He bumps into Giraffe and asks him "Hey..have you seen my tool?"
Giraffe says "What's it look like?"
Porcupine says "Its about this big, has four points on it and is red. I can't find it anywhere."
"Nope" says Giraffe. "Good luck though!"
A little further on, Porcupine meets Monkey. "Hi Monkey. You haven't seen my tool have you? I really need to find it"
Monkey says "The red one, with four points? The one you're so proud of? Sorry dude, no can help."
Porcupine keeps going, getting more frantic all the time. When he sees Buzzard, he asks if he's seen the missing item.
Buzzard sniffs and says "A red four pointed tool? Sounds pretty stupid to me. I wouldn't notice it even if I did come across it."
All day this goes on, and by evening poor Porcupine is at his wits end. He's searched high and low for his tool, but it would seem that its vanished clean out of the jungle.
Just as he's about to give up, he runs into Jaguar, who asks him "Whats the matter?"
Porcupine tells him the story. "I've lost my tool, and I can't find it anywhere. I've had it for ages and it means so much to me. I don't know what to do!"
Jaguar coughs slightly "Umm, whats it look like?"
Porcupine tells him dejectedly "Its about yea big, its bright red, it has four points on it. You'd know straightaway if you saw it, that it belongs to me. I can't understand why nobody has seen it."
Jaguar looks embarassed "I can. Nobody's seen it because its in my belly."
Porcupine looks up, shocked. "In your BELLY? How'd it get there?"
Jaguar shrugs "I.... I ate it"
"WHAT?!?" screams Porcupine "You ATE IT? Why the hell would you eat it?"

"Obviously" came the reply "I'm a red four-point-tool-eater Jag"

Dark Lord Of Custard

Mitch Says " It'll be alright trust me, I'm a yorkshireman..... "
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