Thread: joke of the day
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Old 28-10-2017, 07:18 PM
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Sir Ewok Sir Ewok is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Wherever I damn well Please
Posts: 7,704
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What's with this vajazzle stuff?
In my day a cunt covered in jewellery was called Mr T.

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Remember kids. NEVER take sweets from strangers.
Well, apart from this weekend, when everyone is worshiping the Devil.
Then that's fine.

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3 litres of Frosty Jack for 3.59.
That's why bums go to Iceland.

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We're quite similar to Muslims really. Last night I was kneeling on a mat, head bowed and praying to God.
The only difference was that I was facing the toilet instead of Mecca.

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If a woman drinks two glasses of wine a night it increases the likelihood of a stroke. If she drinks the whole bottle, then she's likely to throw in a blow job as well.

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Terrible news. Cowell rushed to hospital after horror fall.
After a seven hour operation surgeons sadly reported they still couldn't remove his head from his arse.

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My girlfriend said to me this morning, "Man U were shit last night."
I left in tears.
4 minutes is a personal best for me.

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Just bought a massive vagina costume for Halloween.
I'm going as an iphone user.

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I was in Subway with my wife earlier.
She pointed at the bread display and giggled "Your cock looks just like one of those."
"What, a foot long?" I replied, smugly.
"No, covered in cheese."

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