Thread: joke of the day
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Old 13-01-2015, 06:51 PM
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Noisy Scouse Gobshite and Owner of the snigger TM
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: in a house and a tent at weekends
Posts: 19,066

George has been living alone for some years. He's a bit lonely as his life is basically working long hours and spending time at home in front of the TV. So he decides to buy himself a pet for some company. A cat or a dog are no good due to all the hours he works so he thinks a hamster would be okay. So he goes along to the petshop and talks to the owner about buying a hamster and what he would need for it. He also asks about how to look after the little furry creature. Then he goes back home carrying his new hamster, in a shiny cage. He gets home and takes the hamster out of the cage, pets it and feeds it and generally feels quite happy with his new pet. That night he covered the cage with a blanket and the next morning, bright and early, he rushed down to take a look at his new pet. But, there was the hamster, lying dead with its feet in the air! Totally distraught and not knowing what to do, but he decided to phone the pet shop owner. "I'm really sorry to hear that." said the pet shop owner, "We haven’t got any more in stock at the moment but if you come in next week I’ll give you a new one" "But what am I to do with a dead hamster?" George asked. “Well, you can either bury it in your garden, or... if you don’t mind me suggesting it... you can make a special fertilizer for your garden from it!” George was a bit shocked at this, but asked the pet shop owner how to do that. “First you take the dead hamster and put it in a food mixer, add half a bag of sugar, some strawberries and large bucket of water. Mix the hamster, sugar and strawberries and then pour the mixture in to the bucket with the water. Give it a good stir and then go out and spread it on your garden.” Still a little unsure George thanked the owner and put the phone down. He stood there looking at his dead hamster and decided that he would try out the fertilizer recipe and see what happens. After he’d got back from the garden he cleaned himself up and went to bed a little bit upset at what had happened. Next morning he got up and opened his curtains to look at the garden. To his surprise it was full of flowers, bright yellow daffodils all over where he’d spread the fertilizer! He rushed downstairs and phoned the pet shop and told the owner the news... “Daffodils?” he said. “Are you sure they are daffodils?” “Yes,” replied George “the whole garden is full of them.” “That’s very strange” said the pet shop owner... “You normally get Tulips from Hamster Jam!”
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Mitch Says " It'll be alright trust me, I'm a yorkshireman..... "
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