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Search: Posts Made By: Sir Ewok
Forum: Down The Pub Yesterday, 06:43 PM
Replies: 1,626
Sticky: joke of the day
Views: 163,197
Posted By Sir Ewok
I was driving into a tunnel late last night when...

I was driving into a tunnel late last night when I decided to slow down to 5mph. The queue of traffic behind me were raging and sounding their horns. I wasn't taking any chances though, the car in...
Forum: Down The Pub Yesterday, 06:09 PM
Replies: 1,580
Views: 23,632
Posted By Sir Ewok
Well done. https://youtu.be/xuZA6qiJVfU ...

Well done.

https://youtu.be/xuZA6qiJVfU

https://youtu.be/9cQlVww0zKo

https://youtu.be/-vMBp6iUJzk

https://youtu.be/2AzEY6ZqkuE
Forum: Down The Pub Yesterday, 06:00 PM
Replies: 43
Views: 294
Posted By Sir Ewok
When I was at school we would sometimes escape at...

When I was at school we would sometimes escape at lunch times and buy a French stick and a bag of chips, hollow out the bread and fill it with hot steaming chips....Yum!
Forum: Biker Chat Yesterday, 05:57 PM
Replies: 23
Views: 252
Posted By Sir Ewok
Electric may be OK round town but no good for...

Electric may be OK round town but no good for long distance and where do you recharge the bloody things. Many homes (especially on my estate) have no access to the road and people who live in high...
Forum: Down The Pub 13-10-2018, 06:08 PM
Replies: 1,626
Sticky: joke of the day
Views: 163,197
Posted By Sir Ewok
I applied to join the police and they asked me...

I applied to join the police and they asked me what I would do in the event of a terrorist attack.
"I'd get the fuck out of there as fast as I can, " I said.
Start next week, been told they expect...
Forum: Down The Pub 13-10-2018, 05:29 PM
Replies: 1,580
Views: 23,632
Posted By Sir Ewok
https://youtu.be/vaqfgSWQOT0 ...

https://youtu.be/vaqfgSWQOT0

https://youtu.be/VjEq-r2agqc

https://youtu.be/LJ4wa-432xQ

https://youtu.be/FZ4jMSCBswY
Forum: Down The Pub 13-10-2018, 05:23 PM
Replies: 1,580
Views: 23,632
Posted By Sir Ewok
You should get in touch with BT billing dept and...

You should get in touch with BT billing dept and ask for a rebate for all the days you were off line and they should give it to you seeing as they kept saying there was no line fault and not doing...
Forum: Down The Pub 12-10-2018, 05:17 PM
Replies: 1,626
Sticky: joke of the day
Views: 163,197
Posted By Sir Ewok
I took a group of Hunchbacks to the movies last...

I took a group of Hunchbacks to the movies last night.
They were on the edge of their seats.

...............

My 9-year-old told me his teacher said I'm a bad parent.
"Right," I said. "Finish...
Forum: Down The Pub 12-10-2018, 04:49 PM
Replies: 1,580
Views: 23,632
Posted By Sir Ewok
I remember Poly Styrene mainly because she grew...

I remember Poly Styrene mainly because she grew up in my manor (Brixton), looked her up and found she joined the Hare Krishna's and died of cancer aged 53.... Not a huge star but memorable.
...
Forum: Down The Pub 12-10-2018, 04:37 PM
Replies: 43
Views: 294
Posted By Sir Ewok
Ferzackerly.....;)

Ferzackerly.....;)
Forum: Down The Pub 11-10-2018, 05:22 PM
Replies: 1,626
Sticky: joke of the day
Views: 163,197
Posted By Sir Ewok
October is Eczema Awareness Month so I'm raising...

October is Eczema Awareness Month so I'm raising money by selling scratch cards.

.............

Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day.
Give a man a pen and he'll probably draw a cock and...
Forum: Down The Pub 11-10-2018, 04:34 PM
Replies: 1,580
Views: 23,632
Posted By Sir Ewok
https://youtu.be/KmWE9UBFwtY ...

https://youtu.be/KmWE9UBFwtY

https://youtu.be/fc5stxiLSWQ

https://youtu.be/q_GkjymuQ9U

Love this song..... used to sing it in the car all the time.....

https://youtu.be/xvaEJzoaYZk
Forum: Down The Pub 11-10-2018, 04:27 PM
Replies: 43
Views: 294
Posted By Sir Ewok
Trouble with large chains is they have to have...

Trouble with large chains is they have to have modern sounding names, Not 'The Lord Admiral' or the Queen's Arms' but the 'Frog and Newt' or the 'Rainbow Unicorn' to attract the kids. However, the...
Forum: Down The Pub 10-10-2018, 05:17 PM
Replies: 1,626
Sticky: joke of the day
Views: 163,197
Posted By Sir Ewok
That awkward moment at a feminists picnic when...

That awkward moment at a feminists picnic when they realise that no one made any sandwiches!

..............

Iím sick of my workmates, they are such immature cunts, touching everyone and...
Forum: Down The Pub 10-10-2018, 04:38 PM
Replies: 1,580
Views: 23,632
Posted By Sir Ewok
Back to a full crew..... ...

Back to a full crew.....

https://youtu.be/05xmjfOBICg

https://youtu.be/f_X5A-BYjO8

https://youtu.be/bp5BTju5QBM

https://youtu.be/gtOV7bp-gys
Forum: Down The Pub 10-10-2018, 04:25 PM
Replies: 43
Views: 294
Posted By Sir Ewok
It is, in fact we went to a Hungry Horse pub in...

It is, in fact we went to a Hungry Horse pub in Rushden for Christmas Dinner.... Very nice and good size portions.:D
Forum: Down The Pub 09-10-2018, 05:06 PM
Replies: 1,626
Sticky: joke of the day
Views: 163,197
Posted By Sir Ewok
PENSIONERS: Be careful in the travel agents....

PENSIONERS: Be careful in the travel agents. 18-30 holidays are not the bedtimes.

..............

Bright red lights on your dashboard showing low oil and worn brake pads? Cover with at least two...
Forum: Down The Pub 09-10-2018, 04:27 PM
Replies: 1,580
Views: 23,632
Posted By Sir Ewok
Thought you would have started with Telephone Man...

Thought you would have started with Telephone Man by Meri Wilson/ Hanging on the Telephone by Blondie/ Telephone Line by ELO etc.

https://youtu.be/KsForLlmOdk

https://youtu.be/F-ZcOdNN4VY
...
Forum: Down The Pub 09-10-2018, 04:17 PM
Replies: 4,461
Views: 220,838
Posted By Sir Ewok
Picked up a hitch-hiker?:D:D:D

Picked up a hitch-hiker?:D:D:D
Forum: Down The Pub 09-10-2018, 04:16 PM
Replies: 43
Views: 294
Posted By Sir Ewok
That is a possibility, I wanted the one from Bell...

That is a possibility, I wanted the one from Bell End in Wollaston Nr Wellingborough and there is also one near Birmingham, would go well with the sign for Minge Lane......:D
Forum: Down The Pub 08-10-2018, 06:42 PM
Replies: 1,626
Sticky: joke of the day
Views: 163,197
Posted By Sir Ewok
I got touched inappropriately at work today by...

I got touched inappropriately at work today by my boss
But itís fine iím self-employed.

...............

Did you know that the flame of a candle smells like burning nasal hair?
...
Forum: Down The Pub 08-10-2018, 06:00 PM
Replies: 1,580
Views: 23,632
Posted By Sir Ewok
https://youtu.be/7iX7dMJeyrk ...

https://youtu.be/7iX7dMJeyrk

https://youtu.be/r26krlXFmOI

https://youtu.be/SU14_6Ekq9g

https://youtu.be/N__yGuSz7PM
Forum: Down The Pub 08-10-2018, 05:51 PM
Replies: 43
Views: 294
Posted By Sir Ewok
Street names like that are changed because...

Street names like that are changed because residents complain though they didn't complain when they bought a cheaper house because of the street name.... Pub names change because the brewers want hip...
Forum: Down The Pub 07-10-2018, 05:45 PM
Replies: 1,626
Sticky: joke of the day
Views: 163,197
Posted By Sir Ewok
I drove past a gypsy wedding yesterday. I have to...

I drove past a gypsy wedding yesterday. I have to say, it was remarkably like the Royal Wedding.
Everyone was inbred and the taxpayer is footing the bill.

.............

Paddy read that you...
Forum: Down The Pub 07-10-2018, 05:10 PM
Replies: 1,580
Views: 23,632
Posted By Sir Ewok
https://youtu.be/fqGOarTD5gY ...

https://youtu.be/fqGOarTD5gY

https://youtu.be/nhMfd-NhCeo

Friar posted the original of this, so here's a parody.....

https://youtu.be/Z6xXEaWz5Iw

https://youtu.be/-4W1T59NtRc
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