Chap Walks Into A Bar.

[toots&purple]

Chap walks into a bar,walks over sits next to his mate,& puts a bag on the table.Mate says to him what you got there then?Chap pulls out of the bag a little man 12"tall sets him on the table.Mate says to him whats that all about then?chap says im not finished yet,he then pulls out a little piano & a stool, sets it in front of the man,who sits at the stool & begins to play.Mate is even more puzzled,says to the chap youve lost it!nope bare with me chap says & pulls a lamp out of the bag"rub that".The mate does,a big cloud of purple smoke& genie appears,i give you one wish.Instantly the mate says "i wish id got a million bucks".Sure enough theres a cloud of purple smoke,the door opens&a duck walks in,followed by another,& another,& another untill a million ducks are standing around the bar,the mates goin nuts,youre fucking genie is deaf i said bucks,not ducks!Chap says,and you think i asked for a twelve inch pianist???? toot toot. :eek:

[FLACCID]

and ended up in hospital for a week.It was an iron bar......

[Bosun]

and orders a scotch, the barman looks up at this fabulous white stallion and says " i've got a drink named after you" "what Eric?" replies the horse..

[blackhack]

Are you sure that the barman didn't say....Why the long face..??

[Bosun]

Are you sure that the barman didn't say....Why the long face..??
:D :D :D

[toots&purple]

Dyslexic Man Walks Into A Bra !!!!

[blackhack]

lucky bast**d.......

[DANNY]

with a roll of tarmac under his arm and sez pint of bitter for me and one for the road.

[guyver1]

2 Birds sitting on a perch, 1 turns to the other and says, can you smell fish???

2 goldfish in a tank, 1 turns to the other and says, how do you do you drive this then???

[Nitrowing]

A man goes into a sex shop to buy a rubber doll.

The assistant asks, "Do you want an English doll or a Muslim one?"

The man asks, "What's the difference?"

The assistant replies, "The Muslim one blows herself up".

[guydewdney]

a termite walks into a bar and asks"where's the bar tender"


(takes a bit of thought..)

[poridge wog]

sitting on a log and one sez to the other
their right we do taste like chicken :D :D :D