dodgyphil
18-02-2005, 05:39 PM
Drive thru ATM - Saswisch
The Bank wishes to inform all its clients that we are installing
new "Drive-thru" ATM machines, where you will be able to withdraw money
without leaving your vehicle. Please follow the instructions that apply to
you:
For our MALE customers:
1. Drive up to the ATM machine
2. Open your car window
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN
4. Enter amount of cash required
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt
6. Close window
7. Drive off
For our FEMALE customers:
1. Drive up to ATM machine
2. Reverse the required amount to align car window with machine
3. Restart stalled engine
4. Open the car window
5. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to
locate card .
6.Turn the radio down
7. Attempt to insert card into machine
8. Open car door to allow easier access to ATM machine, due to its
excessive distance from car
9. Insert card
10. After "Invalid card" is displayed, remove the Clothing Account
card and insert correct ATM card
11. Remove ATM card
12. Re-insert card right way up
13. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the
inside back page
14. Enter PIN
15. Press "cancel" and re-enter correct PIN
16. Enter amount of cash required
17. Check make-up in rearview mirror
18. Retrieve card
19. Empty handbag again to locate card holder and place card inside
20. Place receipt in back of cheque book
21. Re-check make-up
22. Drive forward 2 metres
23. Reverse back to ATM machine
24. Retrieve cash
25. Re-empty handbag, locate purse and place cash inside
26. Restart stalled engine and pull off
27. Drive for 2 to 3 kilometres
28. Release handbrake :D
The Bank wishes to inform all its clients that we are installing
new "Drive-thru" ATM machines, where you will be able to withdraw money
without leaving your vehicle. Please follow the instructions that apply to
you:
For our MALE customers:
1. Drive up to the ATM machine
2. Open your car window
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN
4. Enter amount of cash required
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt
6. Close window
7. Drive off
For our FEMALE customers:
1. Drive up to ATM machine
2. Reverse the required amount to align car window with machine
3. Restart stalled engine
4. Open the car window
5. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to
locate card .
6.Turn the radio down
7. Attempt to insert card into machine
8. Open car door to allow easier access to ATM machine, due to its
excessive distance from car
9. Insert card
10. After "Invalid card" is displayed, remove the Clothing Account
card and insert correct ATM card
11. Remove ATM card
12. Re-insert card right way up
13. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the
inside back page
14. Enter PIN
15. Press "cancel" and re-enter correct PIN
16. Enter amount of cash required
17. Check make-up in rearview mirror
18. Retrieve card
19. Empty handbag again to locate card holder and place card inside
20. Place receipt in back of cheque book
21. Re-check make-up
22. Drive forward 2 metres
23. Reverse back to ATM machine
24. Retrieve cash
25. Re-empty handbag, locate purse and place cash inside
26. Restart stalled engine and pull off
27. Drive for 2 to 3 kilometres
28. Release handbrake :D