View Full Version : Last night's dream
Mrs Reject
04-02-2005, 12:17 PM
I dreamt last night the pope was dead, it was such a vivid dream - dreamt I heard it on the radio - that I still believed it when I woke up but Mitch said it wasn't possible 'cos he turned the radio off after we'd listened to Captain Nebulus (don't ask!!!). I reckon he is dead and it's a cover up!
Not that it's any great loss to our crowd, bet he'd toss the first match if it was legal :)
at the risk of offending catholics (and maybe others)
why is everyone praying for him?
are they praying for him to get better?
why? are they worried about death? surely if they go to heaven, and heaven is such a good place, they'd all be praying for him to die so he can be in heaven sooner???
or are they worried he might go downwards and so they're praying for his salvation?
I believe Shakespeare got it spot on in 12th night when Fabian asked whatsername why she was mourning her brother, did she think he was in hell?
tis all very odd to me........
BlackPig
04-02-2005, 12:39 PM
He's been dead fer two year already !
Wonderful stuff these modern drugs !! :D :D :rolleyes:
Gypsy
04-02-2005, 12:40 PM
i bet the vice pope (if there is such a thing.. Mmmm vice pope dont sound to good does it, a pope for prossies) is rubbing his hands, is there a back up pope ??? :confused: :D
As the 'most holy-man on earth' I suppose those who subscribe to that religion would rather he be around to continue as a messenger for humanity, to God.
I don't know much of him to be honest, but I reckon that car of his will fetch a bit on EBAY!
Seriously though, he's a very old guy and none of us live forever (except Elvis obviously)
exactly Jay - they mourn and pray for themselves, not the Pope
like all of us who lose someone dear, we weep for ourselves, not for them
and there's nowt wrong with that
exactly Jay - they mourn and pray for themselves, not the Pope
like all of us who lose someone dear, we weep for ourselves, not for them
and there's nowt wrong with that
You are so right, Grief is a strange old job!
My mum had years of terrible Cancers and stuff, but when she died and someone said to me "at least she isn't suffering anymore", selfishly I thought that I would rather she was still here.
mr.chaz
04-02-2005, 01:55 PM
Feckin' religion
feckin' Catholics.
JP should be in an old folks home ( and have been forced to sell his house to pay for it) by now.
I swear , one of these days I'm gonna start my own religion.
Oldest , biggest scam going. :p
Feckin' religion
feckin' Catholics.
JP should be in an old folks home ( and have been forced to sell his house to pay for it) by now.
I swear , one of these days I'm gonna start my own religion.
Oldest , biggest scam going. :p
Hmmm, can I just check, should you, hypothetically speaking, start this religion.....and, just for example, I was to join you, would the main bulk of worship revolve around, lets say, regular gratuitous lovemaking, for instance.
mr.chaz
04-02-2005, 02:11 PM
Hmmm, can I just check, should you, hypothetically speaking, start this religion.....and, just for example, I was to join you, would the main bulk of worship revolve around, lets say, regular gratuitous lovemaking, for instance.
Goes like this:
You join my church.
You relinquish your money and material belongings/property to me.
I shag your wife , girlfriend , daughter , sister , Mother , Grandmother , whenever I want. ( I draw the line at kids and little boys - cos I ain't a Catholic priest -of course)
But....
I'll share my homebrew wiv ya and we can have guns and sh*t to shoot people with if they get too near.
What you think?
Little sketchy maybe?
Mmmm?
poridge wog
04-02-2005, 02:12 PM
Hmmm, can I just check, should you, hypothetically speaking, start this religion.....and, just for example, I was to join you, would the main bulk of worship revolve around, lets say, regular gratuitous lovemaking, for instance.
and if so would the main hymn be OH CUM ALL YE FAITHFULL :p
krammer
04-02-2005, 02:46 PM
catholics? the blood of christ an all that, what are they fuckin vampires?
Crofty
04-02-2005, 03:22 PM
Chazism sounds like the way forward.
Really though, the pope's an old man, he's got terrible parkinsons' If he does survive, I hope they let him retire, it's almost upsetting the way they parade him around. HE'S A VERY UNWELL MAN! LEAVE HIM SOME DIGNITY!!
mr.chaz
04-02-2005, 03:36 PM
Chazism sounds like the way forward.
Form an orderly queue please.
No pushing at the back
Plenty of room on top
ding...ding!
blackhack
04-02-2005, 04:28 PM
How to start your own Cult.....
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Styx/2347/cult.html
Step by Step instructions.........:)
defarter
04-02-2005, 04:37 PM
i bet the vice pope (if there is such a thing.. Mmmm vice pope dont sound to good does it, a pope for prossies) is rubbing his hands, is there a back up pope ??? :confused: :D
Gypsy bow down and pray you shamefull person that you are... have you not heard of Pope in waiting Tony Blair :D :D
ForestFred
04-02-2005, 04:39 PM
Gypsy bow down and pray you shamefull person that you are... have you not heard of Pope in waiting Tony Blair :D :DI thought he thought he was God? Oh no sorry my mistake thats that warmongering fuckhead Bush! :)
Bosun
04-02-2005, 04:59 PM
Goes like this:
You join my church.
You relinquish your money and material belongings/property to me.
I shag your wife , girlfriend , daughter , sister , Mother , Grandmother , whenever I want. ( I draw the line at kids and little boys - cos I ain't a Catholic priest -of course)
But....
I'll share my homebrew wiv ya and we can have guns and sh*t to shoot people with if they get too near.
What you think?
Little sketchy maybe?
Mmmm?
have you been speaking top messr e &t again?
defarter
04-02-2005, 05:16 PM
I thought he thought he was God? Oh no sorry my mistake thats that warmongering fuckhead Bush! :)
No he is the messenger and spreads the word of the Lord God Bush :eek: :D
Spike
04-02-2005, 06:46 PM
Goes like this:
You join my church.
You relinquish your money and material belongings/property to me.
I shag your wife , girlfriend , daughter , sister , Mother , Grandmother , whenever I want. ( I draw the line at kids and little boys - cos I ain't a Catholic priest -of course)
But....
I'll share my homebrew wiv ya and we can have guns and sh*t to shoot people with if they get too near.
What you think?
Little sketchy maybe?
Mmmm?
Just like that Wako thing then.... ;)
kitkatman
04-02-2005, 07:23 PM
at the risk of offending catholics (and maybe others)
why is everyone praying for him?
are they praying for him to get better?
why? are they worried about death? surely if they go to heaven, and heaven is such a good place, they'd all be praying for him to die so he can be in heaven sooner???
or are they worried he might go downwards and so they're praying for his salvation?
I believe Shakespeare got it spot on in 12th night when Fabian asked whatsername why she was mourning her brother, did she think he was in hell?
tis all very odd to me........
i completely agree, i personally do not give a flyin hoot, go on call me heartless, we all live to die, so why try and trick the big man upstairs!
Dougie
04-02-2005, 07:32 PM
Well,whoever's next in line for Pope,it's not gonna be Cardinal Sicola.
Think about it..........
I'm wearing my coat already....
krammer
04-02-2005, 07:36 PM
Well,whoever's next in line for Pope,it's not gonna be Cardinal Sicola.
Think about it..........
I'm wearing my coat already.... grrrroooooaaaaan :) more of a coke man meself!
mr.chaz
04-02-2005, 07:45 PM
Gypsy bow down and pray you shamefull person that you are... have you not heard of Pope in waiting Tony Blair :D :D
Frightening eh? TB - anuva Catholic.
and as for that woman who's been put in charge of Education - and belongs to that weird Catholic cult!
Me feels it's time for a wee bit of "cleansing".
Killemall!
Chaz the Lamb.
(thinkaboutit?)
kitkatman
04-02-2005, 07:51 PM
it should be stuck to a vote......
any nominations of our lot for the job..
just think, you only work on a sunday morning and get a company car....
cxdemon
04-02-2005, 08:04 PM
pat For Pope :d :d
Dougie
04-02-2005, 08:05 PM
Bishop Len Brennan for Pope ye little bollix!
cxdemon
04-02-2005, 09:33 PM
Kick Bishop Brennan up the arse!! :D
Kick Pope Brennan up the arse... :eek:
Sir Ewok
04-02-2005, 10:26 PM
Though I am not a Catholic, I know there is no Pope in waiting or vice Pope. When JP snuffs it and not before a committe of high ranking churchmen will elect the new Pope. I believe that when they have finished there deliberation they burn the voting slips and if they get a majority vote for a candidate there is white smoke from the chimney and if they fail to agree it is black smoke. That way the crowds do not have to wait for an announcement.
Ewokandtuck started several religions, but they get out of hand and start fighting each other. In the end it got too expensive and we cut them loose.....
Ewokandtuck started several religions, but they get out of hand and start fighting each other. In the end it got too expensive and we cut them loose.....
Did you start Catholicism?Just wondered coz I'm sure I saw the Pope in one of Tuck's jumpers... :eek:
Sir Ewok
04-02-2005, 10:59 PM
Obviously not a religious person then, as you would have seen either Jesus or the Virgin Mary.
I can't tell you which religions that we started as they are all fighting each other............. :cool:
Obviously not a religious person then, as you would have seen either Jesus or the Virgin Mary.
I can't tell you which religions that we started as they are all fighting each other............. :cool:
After years of religious education /brainwashing at school I'm definitely not religious.
BikerGran
04-02-2005, 11:56 PM
at the risk of offending catholics (and maybe others)
Well I put me hand up to being one of the 'others' - and I don't understand it either!
But maybe I'm odd. When my mum died, she was 84 and had a stroke 17 months before and been in a wheelchair ever since, and lost all the use of one side of her body, and couldn't do any of the things she liked doing. When me and my sister went to organise her funeral the undertaker didn't know what to make of us cos we were laughing and joking! We were just glad for her that it was over - we'd have liked to have her back the way she was before the stroke, but failing that death was the best thing that could happen for her, and tbh she'd been ready for it for years. Not that she'd given up living, quite the reverse, she had a busy life, always involved in things, always going out - but she'd given away lots of stuff, and labelled things that people should have after she died, and she used to say that her brother and sister and most of her friends had died so when it was her time that would be ok with her.
So it was ok with us too.
Friar Tuck
06-02-2005, 08:45 AM
Ewokandtuck started several religions, but they get out of hand and start fighting each other. In the end it got too expensive and we cut them loose.....
We still collect their dues though, as it written into the doctrine and charters of all newly formed religions. and Chazism is no exception!
mr.chaz
06-02-2005, 09:05 AM
We still collect their dues though, as it written into the doctrine and charters of all newly formed religions. and Chazism is no exception!
I'll send you payment from my newly formed dance troupe' :
The Bouncing Chekz
Sir Ewok
06-02-2005, 11:52 AM
We have not yet recieved any payments and it is well known that budding religions start making money from day 1. If we do not recieve payment within seven working days we will organise another crucifixtion, which did the trick last time. He paid up after the following three days incarceration. You have also not approached us regarding Feast and Festival days. Since the Christian, Muslim< Jewish and Pagan religions have most of them, there are very few left and are getting more expensive by the week. The Mormons couldn't even afford Christmas and they make a mint...... :p
mr.chaz
06-02-2005, 11:58 AM
It's in the post.
As my religion starter kit was purchased on E Bay ( Waco , Texas - one carefull owner), I do believe I have all the neccessary paraphenalia to deal with "7 day wonders" and "accompanying bailiffs and FBI". :D
Sir Ewok
06-02-2005, 12:04 PM
They bought the kit from us and it should have been returned under the Failed World Domination clause.
The protection clauses you mention only work once you have become the DOMINANT religion in that country, not buying a few ex-IRA guns and a rocket launcher. Ewokandtuck Eucemenical storm troopers will tear your followers a new asshole and shove you through it. We have now shortened the payment deadline to 5 working days for your insolence.
Bosun
06-02-2005, 12:05 PM
They bought the kit from us and it should have been returned under the Failed World Domination clause.
.
PMSL thats one of your best lines ewok :)
Sir Ewok
06-02-2005, 12:07 PM
We aim to please, and are pleased to aim (at non-payers) :p
mr.chaz
06-02-2005, 12:36 PM
I don't fail.......... :D
Sir Ewok
06-02-2005, 12:53 PM
Better not, we are not wasting money on another crap religion like the moonies. Haven't paid in months and are claiming wear and tear on their pants due to all the moonies they pull. Bah! They must go.
kitkatman
06-02-2005, 06:24 PM
Well I put me hand up to being one of the 'others' - and I don't understand it either!
But maybe I'm odd. When my mum died, she was 84 and had a stroke 17 months before and been in a wheelchair ever since, and lost all the use of one side of her body, and couldn't do any of the things she liked doing. When me and my sister went to organise her funeral the undertaker didn't know what to make of us cos we were laughing and joking! We were just glad for her that it was over - we'd have liked to have her back the way she was before the stroke, but failing that death was the best thing that could happen for her, and tbh she'd been ready for it for years. Not that she'd given up living, quite the reverse, she had a busy life, always involved in things, always going out - but she'd given away lots of stuff, and labelled things that people should have after she died, and she used to say that her brother and sister and most of her friends had died so when it was her time that would be ok with her.
So it was ok with us too.
my gran died last night in her sleep, I am going to miss her, there is no question there, but she has been ill for a long time and i think that this has been her release from it, i now hope that she is now with my grandad. I want to celerbrate her life rather than mourn it and i will remember all the good times i had with her. god bless her and if there is a place we go after we die, then i will see her again, hopefully not for a good few years yet.
Dougie
06-02-2005, 06:34 PM
Sorry,m8.Been through it ourselves,we know how you feel.
Bassman
06-02-2005, 07:03 PM
Really sorry to hear that M8... Our thoughts are with you and the rest of the family...
kitkatman
06-02-2005, 07:11 PM
Really sorry to hear that M8... Our thoughts are with you and the rest of the family...
thank you, though i have'nt met you peeps yet ( i will do ) this means a lot, it's strange how i think off all of you as friends, ( this is mean't in a nice way and not flippant! )
many thanks
keith
Sir Ewok
06-02-2005, 11:25 PM
Sorry to hear about your gran.
We are all friends on here, I have met and dealt with some of the guys on jere and it's just like an MCC, but without the clubhouse. We meet at rallies and Forum Members Meets. We have real and virtual drinks together and we support each other through tragedies, good times and legal problems. I know you haven't been here long, but that don't matter, you are one of the 100% family. :) :) :)
Condolences to you and yours, Kitkatman.
Cherish the memories...
Spike
07-02-2005, 02:40 AM
my thoughts are with ya bud.
Friar Tuck
07-02-2005, 06:46 AM
So Sorry KKM. Rest in the knowledge that she is now at peace and went in the way that most peeps hope to go, In their sleep.
You will always remember the good times!
My thoughts are with you, Bud!
Mrs Reject
07-02-2005, 03:03 PM
Sorry to hear about that, I seen so many folk linger their twilight years away endlessly in nursing homes, it's nice she went quietly in her own bed :)
brandersnatch
07-02-2005, 03:44 PM
After years of religious education /brainwashing at school I'm definitely not religious.
Amen to that!
I'll get me coat
brandersnatch
07-02-2005, 03:46 PM
KKM I must read to the end of topic before posting my flippancies. Sorry to hear about your loss. All the best and you are in my thoughts.
smeghead
07-02-2005, 04:59 PM
know how yer feeling kkm, lost my grandad over 20 years ago and still think about him daily, my first tatto was in 'memory of ron my grandad' ,so hes with me every day, my nan died 2 years ago at least now she's sat in the big pub in the sky drinking with gramps
ForestFred
07-02-2005, 06:46 PM
Yep been there meself KKM lost both my grans last year within a fortnight of each other Both had good innings though 96 an 102 . still miss 'em.
my gran died last night in her sleep, I am going to miss her, .
Condolences mate, know I aint lookin forward to that day meself!
kitkatman
07-02-2005, 11:31 PM
thank you, everybody, means a lot,
keith
vBulletin® v3.8.7, Copyright ©2000-2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.