Mrs S (stupid)!

[Mrs Reject]

We've all tried to ride off whilst still chained to a tree or run out of petrol but today was really the last straw. Was just going home after doing a bit of shopping in Seaford, came up to a junction and stopped then suddenly realised my legs were totally stuck on the pegs.........on the deck again!!!
Luckily the brake lever that side was already broken. I couldn't believe it!!! My pegs are very high compared to a normal bike and my trousers were very tight + the rubber on my boots grips the rubber coated pegs very well, however put the three together :confused: :eek:
Felt like a right eejit, looked like one an' all :D

[Dougie]

Caught my strides on the kickstart about a year ago.Bike was already leaning to the right,so.......
Or...
A few years ago,I fitted a new sidestand spring.Got to work,let Fran off the back,kicked stand down and stepped off.Unbeknownst to me,the stand retracted under the tension of the new spring.After she stopped laughing Fran lifted the bike off me...........



You are not alone Mrs R! :eek:

[Bosun]

did similar on an old bonnie..
frozen solid




oh the memories it brings back :o

[wegit]

I remember years ago when I first started biking. I was only 'bout 18 (fekin hell, am I that old ???) Anyway, Imaging the scene:

Here I am, a skinny little runt on a fairly new (to me it was new) CB250 Superdream. It was silver in colour (there is a point!) Nice & shiney & the sun is shining to make it look even more shiny !!

Brand new leather boots with silver stripes & black leather gloves with silver stripes. Black leather jacket (of course!!) Black helmet with silver strips & graphics.

Completey colour coded & looking ****-hot !!!!

I was pottering around town looking cool & looking for my mates. I spotted them hanging around our usual haunts and pulled up to show off my new 'Dream.

I waved and pulled up nice and slow to give them the full benefit of my matching kit. Looking cool as fook,


and then:


I TOTALLY, and I mean TOTALLY forgot to put my feet down !!!!! I went over like a right f--king idiot !!!!!

Matching bike, boots, gloves & helmet and looking a right prat with a CB250 Superdream laid on top ov me.

[Mrs Reject]

You posey eejit, always happens when yur trying to look cool and groovy tho' :D :D :D

[wegit]

I know ;o((

Always happens when you have a audience.......never when no ones looking !!!

[Freak]

One cold wet winters night I prepared to leave the pub for the journey home on me cb500t, a trip of about 6 miles. It was of great amusement to me mates and the landlord at the time that after nearly twenty minutes of getting dressed I announced I was busting for a wee. There was no way I was gonna take all me kit off again in front of that bunch of micky taking bastards so I deceided to make a swift dash for the comfort of me own home.
It had turned into a beautiful, crisp early January night. The moon was bright between the motionless clouds and the wet roads must have been close to ice by then as the air had turned freezing cold. It therefore only took about two minutes for the fresh night air to reach me already bursting bladder and by the time I was in sight of me house I was well into the pain zone.
It was gonna be a mad dash to get to the loo. In my head I checked that I knew which pocket had me keys in, which key I needed for the front door, which order me wet weather kit had to be removed etc etc. As i rode down the gravel drive I made the quite brilliant move of easing the sidestand into position in readyness to leap from me bike the instant it came to a halt. This would surely save valuable time dismounting (as every micro-second was gonna be vital)
I approached the concrete slab by the back door at speed. The toilet wasn't an option now as leakage had started. The decision is made to make a dash for the flower bed. As soon as the bike touched the hard standing I screached her to an almost perfect emergency stop. As the top of my leg started getting warm I instantly threw her over onto the stand and prepared to abandon ship OHHHHHH BOLLOX

Yep....the sidestand had already flicked back up and over I went.
Amazing how yer bladder functions properly when yer leg is getting scalded by a hot exhaust and its amazing how much yer mum, dad and little sister bobble about when they're stood together looking out of a window... laughing their socks off. :rolleyes:

[wegit]

Oohhh I know how that feels !!!

I recently (last week in fact) was coming home in my car busting for a pee & looking for a convenient place to do the deed. I was being followed by PC Plod (not literally, but he was behind me) so I couldn't just pull up and head behind a bush !!

I was well on the way home before he dissapeared, so I thought I would head for the comfort on my own loo.

I pulled up outside and had to do a reverse park, nothing worse when you can feel your bladder going !!!!

Anyway, off I shot backwards straight into my new next-door neighbours car !!!!!

A quick look at the damage reavealed a smashed number plate, there was no lights on so in the door and up the stairs to the loo !!!!

GREAT RELIEF !!!! Better than sex (well almost !!!!)

I shot back down the stairs and unscrewed what was left of the registration plate and put it in my wheely bin !!!!

Next morning I am at the door step smoking a rolly (I don't smoke in-doors 'cause of the kids)

The neighbour is out somewhere in his car, but pulls up outside a few minutes later.

I said to him: "Do you know you have no front number plate?"

"No, I should have one!!"

"I bet the kids have nicked it" I said, lying through my teeth!!!!

"The little B**t**ds, I'd better get a new one"

And off he shot, I felt a right c**t but I wasn't owning up!!!!!

[Dougie]

Best hope he don't read this then! :p

[wegit]

Bloody hope not ;o((

[dracken1]

what sort of weird people live in your neck of the woods mrs r.? i mean.

We've all tried to ride off whilst still chained to a tree

why would you chain yourself to a tree in the first place, plus you obiously were'nt chained to it very well if you managed to get on your bike at the same time.
or did you chain yourself to the tree whilst sitting on your bike?
which brings me back to my earlier question...."why" :confused:

it's not a hormone thing is it?

[Bosun]

of course this whole thread has nothing to do with wanting a trike has it ;)

[Mrs Reject]

Oh dear oh dear, it was a big chain and the wheel was chained to a small tree ok :D and yes it is probably hormonal and maybe I subconciously thought I was on a trike - who knows.
People with senile dementia really shouldn't try and ride bikes :)

[dracken1]

i often still put my feet down on a trike when i stop. and every time i do it i feel an idiot :D

[TaxiDave]

I was heading to a mates to do a job on his car and I'd put loads of tools in a rucksack which I put on my back. It probably weighed about forty pounds.
Anyway I pulled up to a T junction which I had to turn right at. I'd pulled up in third and had forgot to put it in first. So a gap appears and I go to pull away. The engine bogged down, and I'd already started to lean into the turn and the weight of my rucksack shifted, and basically pulled me off in a glorified gambole. I hit the ground like a sack of ****e and couldn't get up because of the fucking rucksack.
Oh and by the way it happened tonight. :D :D :D

[madastoast]

When God's dog was a pup I had a Brand spankin' CM 200T an I rolled up at work with everyone stood outside waiting for gaffa to open up and proudly pulled up smilin' not noticin' the plastic carrier bag exactly where I was slammin' the front brake on so bike went one way I went other and I was a laughing stock for a while. Still no damage luckily only me pride and scuffed jeans :D

[BikerGran]

i often still put my feet down on a trike when i stop. and every time i do it i feel an idiot :D

I was warned seriously not to do that or I'd run over my foot! Nearly done it once........

Yep, Mrs R is deffo due for an extra wheel!









(or stabilisers?)

[dracken1]

lol taxidave i used to have one of those raliegh choppers at one time as well. i used to forget what gear i was in also.
my sympathies to you.
40 lbs of tools eh? and you live close to the wrens nest, correct?
don't give me that old flannel ma sun it woz u that dun it.
:D :D

[Mrs Reject]

lol taxidave i used to have one of those raliegh choppers at one time as well. i used to forget what gear i was in also.
my sympathies to you.
40 lbs of tools eh? and you live close to the wrens nest, correct?
don't give me that old flannel ma sun it woz u that dun it.
:D :D

Ahhh yes, Raleigh chops, todays version is for poofs, when I was a kid they had brakes you operated by cycling backwards and it was amazingly hard to stop down really steep hills so was constantly going about with scuffed knees, still do :D
My theory is that all biker girls were terrible tomboys as kids, am I right or am I right? :)

[GarrysPhrogg]

Ahhh yes, Raleigh chops, todays version is for poofs, when I was a kid they had brakes you operated by cycling backwards and it was amazingly hard to stop down really steep hills so was constantly going about with scuffed knees, still do :D
My theory is that all biker girls were terrible tomboys as kids, am I right or am I right? :)


LOL Mrs R
I'm not a puff :D
i don't ride it though, i have it suspended on the wall on my staircase with a biker bear riding it, looks absolutely mad :D.
Do agree with you about the tomboy bit.

Lynne <who is certainly not a puff>

[Gypsy]

rode of on the trike once and didnt put me feet up on the pegs.... nearly ended up with both ankles under the rear wheels.... was a brown trouser moment !!!!!

[Sir Ewok]

Most of the early members will have read these before, so for the benefit of the newbies, here goes:-
Had a Lambretta Li 150 when Noah was a boy. Me and some mates had been watching the White Helmets army display team and one guy was riding backwards sitting on the front muddie. Anybody can do that says a 15 year old Ewok and I was challenged to put me money where me mouth was. Gets scooter started and sits down on the front muddie (which was chromed). By now I had an attentive audience mainly made up of local girlies and I was ready to go. It is actually very easy to ride like this, the hard part is stopping and I am fast approaching a flight of steps going down to the next level. I apply the brakes and slip of the highly polished muddie and run over my own bollox. The laughter of a dozen or so girls made the pain a whole lot less bearable....


The same scoot had a bent drive shaft (unbeknown to me) and as I rode furiously along the road I was overtaken by the back wheel. Helmets weren't compulsory then and as the bike high sided I managed to smack me head against one of those concrete grit bins. Regained cosciousness in some womans house.....

Managed to drive a motorcycle and sidecar through a garden fence, up the path and into the front door of the house. When the old girl opened the door, she said not to worry, Hitler couldn't knock it down so the bike wouldn't worry it..............

While I was still in plaster I went down to devon on the back of my mates Tiger Cub and we camped for two weeks, needed a new plaster when I got back as my future wife was holidaying nearby and spent most of the time shagging, well Icouldn't walk, could I!!!!.............

Managed to lose the exhaust pipe on an M21 outfit whilst being chased by a gang of Mods, drove for miles with a two foot flame coming out from under the petrol tank, those were the days........

Had an Ariel VB 600 sidevalve outfit. Got the bike for free and the sidecar cost £7.50 from Pride & Clarkes in Brixton. The bike was so old it had manual advance and retard. Didn't even know what the lever was for, started the bike and went for a maiden ride. Went down the road, round the block and up a slight hill. Still don't know to this day if I should have advanced or retarded the ignition, but the result was, I stalled it. Ewok's are not reknowned for their slim physique and 15 stone+ leaping on the kickstart should have started concorde, let alone a raddled old 600 sidevalve. BANG! The bast*rd backfired forcing the kickstart to reverse rapidly. Unfortunately this was at the point where the leg is more or less straight and instead of bending, it snapped just below the knee joint. I was thrown in the air and landed upside-down between the bike and chair. Curiously there was no real pain, but I felt really sick and when I tried to stand up, I kept falling over. It was Sunday lunch time and the streets were desserted, so I sat on the bike (Backwards so I could use my good leg) and pushed the bike home. I walked to the bus stop and went to the hospital alone. I got out at 2am plastered from Toe to hip. I guess I was alright till the shock wore off.....

[Mrs Reject]

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, that explains a lot!!! :D

[BikerGran]

Tomboys - yep!

First time I ever broke a bone was age about 5, in school playground, fighting with a boy who tried to take my teddy-bear away from me!

Come to think, it was me leg...... maybe even me left one....... gettin to be a habit....

But as a result of that incident, I rode me first trike! He had one of those big ones with the handbrake and the boot at the back - he felt so bad about breaking my leg, he lent it to me till I could walk properly again!

[Crofty]

You posey eejit, always happens when yur trying to look cool and groovy tho' :D :D :D
I rode past my mate ater stopping to chat to him, accidentally shifted from first to neutral, (hell it was my first bike) revved away like a ***** then Finally found second after slowing down so much I stalled! clever bugger.

[Doro]

nope I wasn't a tom boy

just awkward

:(


funny how I'm now an engineer with tattoos and I love cars n bikes and can fix engines and do plumbing etc

my mates used to laugh at me cos tho I had a 400/4 in the living room while I was rebuilding it, I used to wear marigolds so my nails didn't get oily


:eek: