burnt nipples

[the boatman]

ahhhhh my ribs hurt from laffing at the missus she tryed to be clever and flsh her boobs at me while i was making a cup of tea .....










so i put the hot teaspoon on the left one and pissed myself laffing


am i a bad man .........am I ? :D :D

[Grav]

That's you not getting any sex for a while then........ :D

[the boatman]

nochange there then :D

[Bosun]

im suprised you can still write :D

[the boatman]

lets put it this way my daughter has learnt some new words today .....can't wait for show and tell on Monday :)

[Bassman]

She could have a really bad burn there mate...
































Maybe you should post a pic or seven so we can advise on suitable treatment eh? :D

[Bosun]

did you kiss it better :)

[the boatman]

you don't want that you need to sleep tonight the last thing you need is that image in your head

[the boatman]

did you kiss it better :)
your havin a laff aint ya i can't go near her at least for a month now LOL :D

[Bosun]

have you suggessted it many need numbing????










































num, num, num, num, num,.,num

[Bosun]

ps,,
best remove all sharp objects ( and blunt ones from bedroom :))

[scouselee]

Boatman, I can't believe you're still breathin, if I did that to my wife........ang on, the chances of my missus flashing at me.....never, no way, anyway you're a brave man, and you got to close yer eyes and go to sleep as well.......... Oh dear ;) :D

[Fran]

She's lucky you weren't making chips! :eek: :D

[Friar Tuck]

have you suggessted it may need numbing????










































num, num, num, num, num,.,num
Hey! that's not bad for you Fayji! That made I spit my coffee everywhere! :D

[Violetmay]

Boatman, I can't believe you're still breathin, if I did that to my wife........ang on, the chances of my missus flashing at me.....never, no way, anyway you're a brave man, and you got to close yer eyes and go to sleep as well.......... Oh dear ;) :D


I wouldn't if were ye.. I'd stay awake for the next few days.. you may find hairstraightners taking that kink our yer wotsit!!! :D

[Friar Tuck]

I wouldn't if were ye.. I'd stay awake for the next few days.. you may find hairstraightners taking that kink our yer wotsit!!! :D
And how would you know that he a had a kink in his wotsit? Mmm?

[Violetmay]

And how would you know that he a had a kink in his wotsit? Mmm?

From where his mrs bashed it after he burned her nipples... ha ha !!! :D

[the boatman]

well i survived and i've still got all me bits intact, but she wouldn't hurt me i just so loveable mei am :D

[Juke]

she's just picking her moment to seek revenge May............ ;)

be afraid, be very afraid................ :D

[the boatman]

nah all women love me :D

[the boatman]

nah all women love me :D
specialy older women :D

[Juke]

honey that is because thier eyesight is beginning to fail............pmsl

[the boatman]

shush woman it's not true i just have something wthat gets you all going

[Fran]

shush woman it's not true i just have something wthat gets you all going


You've got chocolate?????!!!!!! :eek: :D

[Juke]

whats that then?.........

a fat wallet?
a matt black bike?
a villa in the sun?


well???????????????.............. :rolleyes:

[the boatman]

You've got chocolate?????!!!!!! :eek: :D
i'm spreading it all over me as we speak :eek:

[the boatman]

whats that then?.........

a fat wallet?
a matt black bike?
a villa in the sun?


well???????????????.............. :rolleyes:
1 outa 3 aint bad but i think it's me good looks :D

[Juke]

you are a fibber!!!!.....you do not have a villa in the sun!.........lol

[the boatman]

you are a fibber!!!!.....you do not have a villa in the sun!.........lol
ohh Villa i thought you said vanillaas in ice cream, but judging from certain photo's on here you had your fill of cream :D

[Fran]

i'm spreading it all over me as we speak :eek:
You look good in chocolate Mr Boatman!

[the boatman]

You look good in chocolate Mr Boatman!
oowwww can i take it to the bridge sex machine :D

[critch]

You look good in chocolate Mr Boatman!

'kinell ken dodds got one hell of a suntan.... :D

[Mistress Maker]

ahhhhh my ribs hurt from laffing at the missus she tryed to be clever and flsh her boobs at me while i was making a cup of tea .....










so i put the hot teaspoon on the left one and pissed myself laffing


am i a bad man .........am I ? :D :D


lol, you know people pay good money for that kind of thing boatman ! is there summat you wanna tell us about your career aspirations :eek:

[the boatman]

Hey if you've got a nice pair i'll do it for nout :D

[slob]

funny as fuck.. the best I can do is the neck... I just read the opening statement and she said " that sounds bloody familiar! :D

[the boatman]

it's strange she aint shown um to me since lol :D